How I realized complaining is not good for me
“If you don’t like something, change it. If you can’t change it, change your attitude. Don’t complain”.
Those who wish to get things done quickly can relate with the profoundness of this quote. When things don’t act in our favor, we are inclined to change it. For example, you may be upset with your daughter for not doing her homeworks properly, or you may upset with your team member for gossiping about others in the team, or you may be upset with your brother for spend money lavishly, without knowing the value of it. You try your level best to change them, but what will you do when they don’t change? Will you constantly complain about their behavior and are obsessed in making them change? This blog tries to shed light on the practice of complaining and how to come out of it.
Is it better said than done when I say stop complaining?
My life experience will demonstrate that complaining will not do anything good for my mental well-being. And with that experience gained, I have listed three golden points that will help avoid complaining.
Judging, complaining and preaching
The discomfort caused by complaining is mainly because we become judgmental. If we want someone to change for the better, then we should not engage in judging frequently. The practice of accepting people as they are is highly necessary to maintain a strong bond. Everybody knows their faults. The more and more we try to impose our thoughts of changing them by judging them, the more and more they will not listen to us. For example, if your daughter is constantly talking over the phone with her friends thereby causing disturbance to your work, you can tell her in such a way that she understands. If she still doesn’t change, just relax. The mindset of humans is that they don’t accept preaching. Here the tone of your voice is important.
Give priority to your work when you feel like complaining
With experience, I have found that complaining stresses you to a great extent. Besides, it will stop you from concentrating on your priorities. Hence, the key is focusing on your immediate work and doing it diligently. We know that this world is not perfect and the situation in work place too may be not liked by us. But the point is in concentrating on your goals. And the hard reality is that you cannot drastically change the world. You can only do it gently and slowly. And this process should begin from within you. But luckily if things change as per your wish then congratulate yourself for your patience and compassion.
I still remember asking my father in late years which is the best quality a person can have. He told. “ flexibility” in a thoughtful tone. Yes. I can understand the profoundness of this thought. When we are faced with difficulties, we tend to get so dejected that we carry the sadness for a long time. This is understandable in case of major losses. In case of major losses, cry for it as much as you can, but don’t get carried away by it. Don’t keep on complaining about the bad things that happened to you. The key is in bouncing backing to normalcy as soon as you can. Resilience is much needed to carry out your responsibilities in a diligent manner.
The moment I started realizing that life is too wonderful to be spend complaining and worrying is the moment I cherish the most.