How to understand the essence of setting big goals

Setting big goals. Goals is good. But what is this big goal? Why is this adjective given to it? Well, that’s what we are used to in our lives. We give big terms for various aspects of life and sometimes children become scared of listening to these verbose words. Parents say to the children, “Have big aim in life”. Hm…that is understandable. But what we fail to realize is that setting big goals will only add to our anxiety. Lets dive deep into it:

Setting big goals can make us anxious

Well, don’t get me wrong when I say this. It is good to set goals in life. I don’t deny that. But when we start labeling it as “big” there comes a sudden apprehension as to how we can achieve it. A goal can neither be too big nor too small. For a person who is ambitious, his/her goal is great. By titling it as big or small will only confuse the person. The person will be anxious as to how he/she will achieve the goal.

The psychology of being obsessed with achieving goals when they are big

This is a competitive world. When we set big goals, we tend to become obsessed with them. We endeavor to achieve them in a short time because of the fear that we may lag in the journey. However, the idea of achieving goals is not that. They require patience and perseverance.

We may start to doubt our ability in achieving the goal

This is also another possibility. We may think how can we achieve such big goals. When our spirit is low, we may even give up on the goal because of its gigantic shape. Say one person is already doing a great job without contemplating too much about life. If we say to that person, “you have to set big goals in life”, he/she may not get it right. For him/her, flowing with life is the norm. On the other hand, some people follow a methodical approach to life and plan it accordingly. For such type of people, in order to raise the bar, they will set big goals. So the key lies in understanding the perceptions of both types of people.

 Don’t confuse your emotions with your words

When we want children to set goals in life or even try to motivate a frustrated person lets not confuse our emotions with our words. This is the mistake all of us make and I can understand this. For this, we need to practice meditation, yoga, and other calming techniques so that we keep our emotions at bay. Lets not say, “Set big goals in life” to an utterly depressed person. That might panic him/her more. Let us be practical and ask them to set realistic goals. Even when we are asking our children to do goal-setting, lets understand their temperament and then proceed with asking them to do goal-setting.

Goal-setting is indeed good, but let that not make us despondent. Set goals which you are capable of achieving and don’t be intimidated by the terms “think rich”, “big goals” etc. Sometimes the titles can be misleading. Get the essence of the message. All the best!

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