Is forgiving the best solution when you feel wronged?
We all have situations in life wherein people would have wronged us. We cannot accept this, and we brood over this. We wonder why such things happen in our life. Different people get upset due to different things. What can we do to handle such situations? If we know the secret of leading a worry-free life wherein we are not carried away by self-pity due to being wronged, we have indeed found the key to peace. Let us see how we can handle such situations gracefully:
Don’t be preoccupied with why people wronged you
Now that you have realized that people have taken advantage of you, just try to come out of it. It is indeed a difficult thing, and there are also chances of you plunging into depression. But remember that it is your life, and you have to mold it with grace. Give yourself the needed time to come out of the mental distress.
Talk it out with the person in context
When you talk to the person who has wronged you, there will be several surprising revelations too. You will understand why they were unfair with you. This can also mostly happen in situations of performance appraisal. You would feel that you have done a great job, but the management would have thought otherwise. It is always better to get things clear from the concerned people. After all, the problems we assume are worse than the real ones.
Practice being at peace with yourself
On your part, try to do all relaxation techniques for your betterment. This will help you in facing any unpleasant event with equanimity. At the end of the day, you will realize that your peace is more important than holding a grudge towards those who wronged you. Instead of thinking from the angle of whether the other person deserves your forgiving, you simply think from the perspective of your peace of mind.
Don’t be too much concerned with the term forgiving
Do you get anxious when you hear the word forgiving? You needn’t. Just let the situation flow, and keep doing your duties diligently. Rather than trying to forgive or forget the situation, simply try to ignore it. Remember that thinking about why you have been treated in an unacceptable manner will only add to your agony and eventually lead to depression. On the other hand, when you try to reason out the action and let it go, it will be much in favor of you.
Finally, you will realize that the mental turmoil you are facing due to being wronged is just a passing cloud when you approach the conflict with the right frame of mind. You can just be casual with that person who has wronged you, but ensure that you don’t pave the way for them to do the same mistake to you again. Again, it all depends on the severity of the act. For example, a friend who lost his/her temper and shouted at you for no reason can be approached personally, and everything can be set right by deep conversations. However, what about those who cheated you cruelly? We are hearing lot of stories of those who are wronged with regard to money, love affair etc. These should be approached discretely as it deems necessary. But when it comes to relations, i.e. with regard to your near and dear ones, it is always better to understand them and even put yourself in their shoes. After all, a bitter life is definitely not a better life! Your thoughts are welcome here.